Heat Games

Mar 05 2014 Published by under Last Week

Part 43 of my third global warming science fiction novel “Last Week”. Link to Part 1: “Back To Paradise Era”.

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 18 2023 1:22 P.M.

“This looks delicious,” Angel said. “I am really lucky to be…”

She stopped talking mid-sentence. Her hand with the fork froze close to the plate. As did the rest of her body.

“Huh?”

Satoshi didn’t understand what was happening. Was Angel pulling some kind of prank on him? Pretending to freeze completely, and watching for his reaction? This was very much not like her.

Then, all of a sudden, there was a sound of thunder, a flash of intense green light, and a figure appeared out of thin air, standing right next to their restaurant table.

A catholic bishop. A man of abouty fifty-five years, bald, beardless, wrinkles in his face, wearing a bishop’s vestments. On his head he had a mitre, a richly decorated high headgear of a diamond shape. A large Episcopal ring was decorating his left hand. On his body there was a long wide-sleeved tunic, the dalmatic, which was unable to hide his overweight. A golden cross on his chest completed the picture.

“Khalmorot?” Satoshi asked.

“Exactly.”

“What happened to Angel? Is she all right?”

“Don’t worry. I’ve just put her into hypnosis for a couple of minutes. I need to talk to you in private,” Khalmorot said.

“What do you want?”

“First off, I need to explain that time machine. You already know that it’s not real.”

“Yes,” Satoshi said. “I saw that with the Glaring Glasses the other day. So that was true?”

“It was. That whole time machine story couldn’t have been true in the first place. Did you notice why?”

“No.”

“It’s easy. If it were true, Angel’s mission would destroy everybody she knew. Her father, the Emperor. Her teacher. Her lover. Everybody. So of course it would destroy her as well. Which would mean there would be no Angel to get on the time machine in 2323,” Khalmorot explained.

“Now that you say so, yes, that makes sense.”

“And if we actually had a time machine, we’d go back into our own past to warn our own ancestors,” Khalmorot said.

“But Angel said she lived all of her life in the 24th Century.”

“I set her up with that memory. It’s easy to do if you have the creative efforts of a couple of hundred million years of civilization along with our technology in databases and direct brain interfaces. The Glaring Glasses are only a little taste of that.”

“So all of that is not true. Will she remember any of her life as a Princess once she wakes up from this dream?”

“Yes. She will remember all of that exactly, but she will know that it is all not true. Just like someone might remember a good book or movie.”

“You must be some kind of alien species.”

“Of course. That’s why we have such far superior technology. Did you know Mount Fuji in Japan is a spaceship?” Khalmorot asked.

“No. I’ve never heard that one.”

“It only looks like a mountain. Actually, it’s the spaceship in which we came to your planet about two hundred million years ago. I was on that spaceship when we arrived.”

“You’re two hundred million years old?”

“No. I’m over three hundred million years old. I lived as a Prince of my race for a couple of centuries before our planet went up into smoke from our own runaway global warming. My mind is mirrored in a large computer database, and I have robots I can use if I want to walk around in the real world,” Khalmorot said.

“Is your planet far away? How did you know about Earth?”

“It’s right next door. You call it Venus.”

“What? There was intelligent life on Venus?”

“There sure was. But we were not intelligent enough to avoid the fossil fuel trap. Just like humanity, we burned through all our fossil fuel in the first couple of thousand years of our civilization. We started a runaway global meltdown positive feedback loop. The kind you call ‘Venus syndrome’ here. It was a really stupid thing to do, in hindsight. If we really had a time machine, we would of course go back and warn our own ancestors.”

“So now you are trying to stop global warming on Earth by setting me up with bitcoins and Angel with the Glaring Glasses and her time machine story?”

“Of course not. Quite the reverse.”

“What?”

“I’ve been causing global warming on Earth,” Khalmorot explained.

“Why would you do such a thing? It doesn’t make sense.”

“You think global warming makes sense? I mean, you are a species smart enough to start civilization. But right at the same time you are stupid enough as to burn all the fossil fuel? How do you explain that basic contradiction?” Khalmorot asked.

“I’ve never thought about that.”

“The explanation is very simple. Humanity has not burned all that fossil fuel on their own. I hypnotized your leaders and made them do it over the last couple of centuries.”

“That explains things. We actually were not so stupid on our own. Though there might be some of my fellow humans who have achieved this impressive level of stupidity without outside assistance. But why would you do that? Why would you want Earth to go the way of Venus?”

“It’s for this television show I’m running. The HEAT GAMES. It has the highest ratings ever. In our whole history. Of course it’s somewhat controversial. Some of our viewers object. But that’s great to get higher numbers.”

“What? This whole global warming crisis is happening so that a bunch of aliens can have fun in a television series? With humanity as the unwitting suicidal stars?”

“Exactly. Entertainment rules the world. Of course, we can always make you turn the heat down again. We could kill all humans anytime we want. Just as you are eradicating all those other species. That would stop global warming right there. It sure would. I am rather sure of it. But killing all humans would deprive us of a very important source of entertainment. It’s really kind of fun watching you morons fall into exactly the same trap that fried our own planet.”

“So why have you set up Angel and me with this?”

“It’s because of the Moros 27 asteroid. That part is quite real. We are monitoring space for potentially dangerous asteroids, and we found this one three hundred years before impact.”

“Would that be dangerous to you as well?” Satoshi asked.

“We’re very well adapted to high temperatures. A couple of centuries of vaporized rock blanketing Earth wouldn’t be much of a threat. We’re quite safe way down in our mountain. Except if the asteroid happens to impact directly on Japan. That would be very bad news. We would need to move our spaceship, and we are not sure that would be easily done after two hundred million years.”

“So there is a risk for you?”

“There is. There sure is. Besides, if Moros 27 hits the Earth, all life is going to be wiped out. That would be bad news because Earth would become a rather boring planet. Humanity serves a very important purpose in our society. You are providing our entertainment. The last couple of thousand years have been the most hilarious ride ever,” Khalmorot said.

And disappeared in another flash of green light.

Link to part 44: Explaining the Truth

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